August Family Weekend Memorial!

I did it! I found a way to post a picture! Thanks to #2 son for his tutoring......

Anyway, here is the inukshuk

Silence

After six months of silence.....

It isn't that life has not been full, that there has not been lots to comment on but somehow it has never been translated into words on a blog. I have barely any entries in my journal either. I follow a number of blogs and so enjoy them! Maybe that is one reason I don't post, I don't think I have anything interesting to post!

I think one reason for the silence has been a grief , one that affects so many people. How do I deal with it? How do I be honest but not condemning? So silence is sometimes the best way.

But there have also been so many joys to enjoy. The celebration of my 60th birthday with the whole family! I felt so loved, so honored. I celebrated for a couple of weeks with friends and most of all with family!

Then there was the family weekend at Grandma and Grandpa's place! Such a memory building time with a trip to Drumheller and one to Calgary Zoo. The huge inukshuk in the yard stands as a memorial to a great family time.

Now it is time to get ready for a weekend of camping, something we don't do enough! The morning is rainy but the forecast is for sunshine eventually so I shall believe that will happen. Before we know it there will be time for snow shovels and Christmas preparations!

Up cycle

I keep finding these projects I want to try.  Found an article on cloth paper so now I have bags sitting in my sewing room to collect those bits of fabric that I hate to throw out but that are too small to sew anything with.  Then I looked up felting.  Off to the local thrift shop for wool sweaters.  I closed my eyes to the fact that these sweaters are perfectly good to wear and then dumped them into the washer with hot water and an old pair of jeans.  After a day of washing and drying and washing and drying I have felt.  Now, what will I do with this felt?  Good question... but if I put this into print maybe someone will hold me accountable.

I have some ideas and then I wonder "what will I do with these creations?"  "who would want them?"

But I am having fun and I am beginning to believe that maybe I do have some creativity in me.  And part of the 'fun' is using what is available without spending a lot of $$$$$.  I have a daughter-in-law who inspires me and her example of re-cycling and up-cycling encourages me to try new ideas.

But don't ask to see the sewing/laundry room!  What a disaster!  I get an idea, pull out the necessary 'ingredients' then move on to something else without putting anything away....  I must improve in that department........

And then of course there are meals to make, only for two but he does need some food!  Off to the kitchen..........

Listening

Somewhere in the Bible it talks about the need to become like children.  I had that reminder recently.....

While visiting a family the parents of a 3 year-old told us about her dream.  She told her Mom that she dreamt that God talked to her about not being afraid. She also said that God knew her name. I don't recall all the details about the dream but there were 2 things that I continue to mull over and over.

First, she knew it was God talking to her.  I did a little looking this morning and found verses in John 10 that talk about the sheep knowing the voice of the shepherd.  Way too often I forget or overlook the voice of the Shepherd.  I don't 'hear' a loud audible shout but I know I can hear a quiet, gentle voice in my mind.  Yes, sometimes it is only my own thoughts, but when the words are loving, encouraging, gentle why do I over look them as God.

Second, there seemed to me to be a sense of awe or wonder that God knew her name.  That is a humbling thought for me too.  I get whiney, demanding and overlook the fact that God knows me personally.  He knows my name.  I want to be in awe of that.... to believe that and trust Him.

A little child shall lead them.....

Thank you "Dad and Mom" for telling us about this moment.  I have really benefited from hearing it! 

Like my mother....

While I was emptying the dishwasher tonight I pulled out 2 spatulas, and I thought about my Mom.

Mom was more than careful with what she had.  She was so frugal and made do all of her life.  She had one spatula.  By the time I left home I don't think it could be called a spatula any longer. Actually it was always called the "rubber scraper".  But there was only ever one 'rubber scraper' and in time it was actually 'a wooden stick with some rubber around it'. (it was obviously better rubber than we have now on the cheapey rubber spatulas!!)  How could it ever have scrapped anything?  And because it was the only one and used for everything it was discolored and brown.  It was clean.  Mom was very careful with 'clean' but it was an interesting shade of brown.

When we were married we had a rubber scraper.  I don't know if it was a wedding gift or if I bought it but we had one.  After a number of years I came to realize the monetary value of a rubber scraper.  So why the heck did I only have one and why the heck was it just as discolored and worn as my Mom's?  I made a decision to: 1. have more than one rubber scraper and 2. throw them out when the rubber was cracked and broken!

I often wonder what sort of things our Daughter will realize she has been doing/is doing because 'that is the way Mom did it'!  I hope she can smile and do it differently .......

a long day

I have no idea why it has seemed like such a long day!  I swear it felt like it was 30 hours long!  Maybe the post-Christmas blues have hit.  Maybe reality has hit.  Maybe ......

I finally finished the basement.  If repair men weren't coming tomorrow to work on the boiler I doubt I would have been that ambitious.  It seems that unless I have myself some incentive I can procrastinate for a very, very, yes, very long time.  The after Christmas laundry has been done for over a week but I don't like making beds for some reason so the clean sheets have been sitting on the beds, waiting.  And then there is the vacuuming.  But now it is decent, even the bathroom.  

I actually accomplished quite a bit today, didn't sit around feeling lonely or bored but it was a long, long day.

And now people are coming for care group.

I wonder what tomorrow will be like.........

Twenty ten

I understand 'twenty ten' is 'the way' to speak of the new year.  Not quite sure when I started to care about 'the way' of speaking......

As I wrote the Christmas letter in December, I commented on how quickly 2009 had passed. Later I discovered that this was basically the same way I began the letter of 2008!  I hope I come up with a better way to begin a letter at the end of this year.  But it does seem that the older I get the quicker the years go by.

A new year has often found me melancholic and contemplative.  Some times I have been downright depressed.  I still remember and can still feel the night of new year's day 29(?) years ago.  I had suddenly realized that was the year that our first born would begin school.  I began to grieve 8 months before anything happened.  No wonder I found life difficult at times.  I kept carrying burdens that no one, not even God expected me to carry.

I continue to learn to live by faith, to accept the present, to enjoy the moment.  I continue to believe it is a lifetime process and will experience ups and downs in that process.  I was reminded recently that eternal life is knowing God,  knowing Jesus.  (John 17:3 I think!). Eternal life is qualitative and not quantitative.  Well, I realize that there is eternity sometime, somewhere but sometimes I am less sure of what that means too.  More need for faith I think!

And so I wish you eternal life in the coming year.  That sounds rather weird but somehow I think that is exactly what I want for people, not a head full of knowledge but a "knowing" of God and a "knowing" of what it means to be his child.

New year's day, 2010? I don't really recall one contemplative thought!  We went to see "The Blind Side" which did bring some 'thinking'.  We both enjoyed it and for us, to BOTH enjoy and no one sleeping !!!  it was a good movie.  Not profound but a feel-good story based on true life.  After that, we had a meal at the Keg thanks to a gift certificate from friends and were home by 6!  Yikes, we are getting old.